第51章
《THE CATCHER IN THE RYE(麦田里的守望者英文版)》章节:第51章,宠文网网友提供全文无弹窗免费在线阅读。!
How's Connecticut?" or "How's
Florida?" It was a terrible place, I'm not kidding. I cut out going there entirely, gradually.
It was pretty early when I got there. I sat down at the bar--it was pretty crowded--
and had a couple of Scotch and sodas before old Luce even showed up. I stood up when I
ordered them so they could see how tall I was and all and not think I was a goddam
minor. Then I watched the phonies for a while. Some guy next to me was snowing hell
out of the babe he was with. He kept telling her she had aristocratic hands. That killed
me. The other end of the bar was full of flits. They weren't too flitty-looking--I mean they
didn't have their hair too long or anything--but you could tell they were flits anyway.
Finally old Luce showed up.
Old Luce. What a guy. He was supposed to be my Student Adviser when I was at
Whooton. The only thing he ever did, though, was give these sex talks and all, late at
night when there was a bunch of guys in his room. He knew quite a bit about sex,
especially perverts and all. He was always telling us about a lot of creepy guys that go
around having affairs with sheep, and guys that go around with girls' pants sewed in the
lining of their hats and all. And flits and Lesbians. Old Luce knew who every flit and
Lesbian in the United States was. All you had to do was mention somebody--anybody--
and old Luce'd tell you if he was a flit or not. Sometimes it was hard to believe, the
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people he said were flits and Lesbians and all, movie actors and like that. Some of the
ones he said were flits were even married, for God's sake. You'd keep saying to him,
"You mean Joe Blow's a flit? Joe Blow? That big, tough guy that plays gangsters and
cowboys all the time?" Old Luce'd say, "Certainly." He was always saying "Certainly."
He said it didn't matter if a guy was married or not. He said half the married guys in the
world were flits and didn't even know it. He said you could turn into one practically
overnight, if you had all the traits and all. He used to scare the hell out of us. I kept
waiting to turn into a flit or something. The funny thing about old Luce, I used to think he
was sort of flitty himself, in a way. He was always saying, "Try this for size," and then
he'd goose the hell out of you while you were going down the corridor. And whenever he
went to the can, he always left the goddam door open and talked to you while you were
brushing your teeth or something. That stuff's sort of flitty. It really is. I've known quite a
few real flits, at schools and all, and they're always doing stuff like that, and that's why I
always had my doubts about old Luce. He was a pretty intelligent guy, though. He really
was.
He never said hello or anything when he met you. The first thing he said when he
sat down was that he could only stay a couple of minutes. He said he had a date. Then he
ordered a dry Martini. He told the bartender to make it very dry, and no olive.
"Hey, I got a flit for you," I told him. "At the end of the bar. Don't look now. I
been saving him for ya."
"Very funny," he said. "Same old Caulfield. When are you going to grow up?"
I bored him a lot. I really did. He amused me, though. He was one of those guys
that sort of amuse me a lot.
"How's your sex life?" I asked him. He hated you to ask him stuff like that.
"Relax," he said. "Just sit back and relax, for Chrissake."
"I'm relaxed," I said. "How's Columbia?